In my heart, I have always been a songwriter, musician, producer and performer. It is my deepest inner-calling, yet for most of my life I ignored it. I ignored that inner-voice that we all have and instead listened to the chorus of voices that told me pursing a career in music was not practical. I spent years of my life pursuing the ideas of others. I attempted to complete a college degree and worked in multiple industries doing various jobs over many years; none of which had anything to do with the music that dwelled so deeply within my heart.
After unintentionally settling into a career in private education, getting married and having three beautiful children, my inner-world began to crumble. It was no longer feasible to maintain the illusion that I was happy without pursing my dream of music. As I clung tenaciously to the facade I had created for myself, I became bitter and grouchy. I began to struggle with deep depression. All the while I continued going to a job I had no desire to be at. I suffered. My family suffered. My wife encouraged me on many occasions to take a chance and make the leap into full-time pursuit of music. She is the true hero of this story for without her support, I would have never taken any action in the direction of my dreams.
The day I was laid off from my job was the biggest turning point in my life. It felt as if I had been re-born and given a second chance. I accepted the news with a smile on my face and many of my friends still remark to this day how odd my reaction to being laid off was. My reaction was of great joy because I had been set free. My depression had led me to complete inaction. I was so deeply immobilized by my negative feelings that I was unable to take any steps to better my situation and follow my heart. The layoff was just a kick in the pants from the universe.
From that day on, I have woken up everyday with a hunger to create and spread my music as widely as possible. I have woken each day as the musician I truly am; and that I have always truly been. This brings a deep inner joy I could never adequately articulate with words. Opportunities have continued to arise that I could have never foreseen prior to losing that old day job I never wanted. Being a full-time musician is not easy. The struggle is real, and it is daily. But I am a warrior for my dream now and take great pride and joy in rising to fight each and every day for the rest of my life.
Blessed is he who follows his heart.